As we approach Thanksgiving, it’s fitting that this week’s portion is Vayetze. In this portion, we see how gratitude opens Jacob’s eyes to the beauty of God. While our circumstances this Thanksgiving may differ greatly from those of previous years, we should view the current moment as an opportunity to practice gratitude. It may feel especially difficult to be grateful in a year that has taken so much from us in many ways. But remember, gratitude comes from seeing everything in our lives through fresh eyes. The pandemic has taken many things, but it has also given us something of value: a new perspective.

Perhaps, before this disruption, we took many things for granted. But now, with everything upended, we are able to appreciate what we have in ways we might not have before. The fear of loss has brought with it a renewed sense of awe and respect for the gifts we still hold. And while we may feel that the changes we’ve experienced are out of our control, we still have choices about how we respond to them. We can choose not to waste this time. We can use it to grow, to build. If we make good use of this time, we will be better prepared when “normality” returns. At that point, the challenge will be maintaining the deeper sense of gratitude that we’ve cultivated.

In this week’s portion, we see Jacob lose everything. He leaves his home and, on his journey, he falls asleep on twelve stones. That night, he dreams of God. In the dream, God tells him that the land on which he is sleeping will one day be his. The twelve stones represent the twelve tribes of Israel, a message about the future of the Jewish people. When Jacob wakes up, he doubts the validity of the dream, questioning whether someone like him could really be worthy of such a message from God.

How often have we second-guessed our own worthiness, doubting whether we are deserving of the blessings that come our way? It’s a natural reaction.

What changes everything for Jacob is gratitude. We must remember that gratitude is like a cup—it is the vessel that holds our blessings. Without it, our gifts slip away; they pass us by. It is only when Jacob shows gratitude to God that he begins to understand his own beauty and accepts the message God has for him. We should be thankful that he did! After all, Jacob had a special purpose. His mission was to build the "central column"—a balance between the desires of giving and receiving, serving others and being served. This is the righteous harmony that Jacob was called to bring into the world.

This should be our focus too. Of course, it’s not always easy in our modern world, which tends to devalue service while exalting selfishness. But Jacob’s story remains potent because it shows us that true fulfillment lies not in shallow rewards but in the pursuit of something more meaningful—something real. This is the choice we must all make. Jacob’s story should not just be a story we read; it should become the story of our lives. To find our "central column," we must deprioritize our selfish desires and instead focus on balancing them through giving to, sharing with, and serving others. Thanksgiving is a perfect time to practice this.

At first glance, Jacob might seem like the perfect example for a motivational speaker. He starts with nothing, sleeping on the ground, and ends up with four wives and twelve tribes. Doesn’t this sound like the narrative of individual triumph that motivational speakers often promote? But Jacob’s story is not about individualism. In fact, Jacob was far from a self-centered person. When he was taken care of by his father-in-law, a man of deceit (Laban, who was no good), he realized that the wealth he had gained under those conditions was meaningless.

Jacob chose to leave the gilded cage of material success in pursuit of the "central column"—a life of balance and harmony that also serves others. What a remarkable journey! At the beginning of the portion, he has nothing to lose. By the end, it seems he has everything—but he chooses to walk away from it all. This is a truly inspiring moment. Surely we can agree that it’s easier to leave difficult circumstances than to walk away from comfort and wealth. But Jacob was wise enough to understand that having everything given to him by someone like Laban was worse than having nothing. More importantly, he had the courage to act on this knowledge.

In life, we will all face moments of great loss. It’s easy to become stuck in bitterness during these times, to focus on injustice and settle into a victim mentality. But perhaps we should ask ourselves: What is God making space for in our lives through this loss? Desperation, Jacob shows us, can spark inspiration. After all, didn’t he escape his dire straits to end up with the twelve tribes? Jacob teaches us that, in the end, there is always a reason to thank God for our moments of misery.

But Jacob offers us an even greater lesson: to be discerning about our lives, to critically assess our successes. In our society, it’s easy to rise through selfish means and earn the admiration of other selfish people. For those of us on a spiritual path, we cannot find our worth in these hollow prizes, no matter how attractive they may seem. Instead, we must ask ourselves: Do we have the courage to ask God for something real—even if it means losing everything we have?

Jacob did this, and his story reminds us of the need to be brave about our values. It may be a lonely path, but there is no spiritual alternative. We must choose to reject what is false in order to pursue what is true and real.